Usually I'm not into gossip, at least not on this site anyway, but I have to talk a little about poor Britney Spears. I watched her interview with Matt Lauer last night and all I can say is, that poor stupid girl. I never thought I'd feel sorry for a super rich diva, but I do. When she cried about the paparazzi chasing her down, I cried a tear or two too.
The way things went down were like this. Matt showed up at her house and when he was coming through her huge security gate after a full body cavity search he came upon Kevin Federline in the front yard. Sure, he was suckin' down a Milwaukee Best in a beer cozy watering the front lawn with the hose, but he was there.
Matt went into Britney's house, with cameras off because she didn't want to give away the identity of where she lives, although she claims helicopters hover twice a day to get pictures of her dropping her kid again. Anyway, they set up the interview in what looks like the living room. Of course, by looking at the couch in the background I'm hoping this is the dog's room because it's just awful.
Now, I don't know who Brit's handlers are, but they must be really pissed at her for some reason, or not there, because she just looked awful. I won't go into the short denim mini skirt and trailer trash shoes. She hadn't washed her hair since the baby was born and her make-up was so wrong. Actually, the make up part wasn't horrible, but one of her fake eyelashes was threatening to fall off. How she didn't see or feel that I'll never know. The worst part, that confirmed that no one that cared about her was anywhere near this interview room was the gum chewing. All that leads me to believe that the poor girl has no one. No Joe Simpson to make sure her hair looks nice and she spit out her gum.
During the interview Matt tries to get some good juice, but in fear of Kevin and the rest of the back up dancer gang kicking his ass, he doesn't push too hard. Of course he asked her about the rumors that Kevin's living in the basement. As far as I know basements in California are fairly rare. She says no, that he's not living in the basement. He's living in the apartment over the garage. Not really, but that'd be funny. When Matt asks her to talk about their relationship she says that Kevin's just "simple". I'm assuming she means he's low maintenance and not stupid, but hey, she could mean that too.
The interview starts out well enough, even with the gum chewing, but as it progresses her accent gets thicker and thicker and she starts lying more and more. She has diarrhea of the mouth. I think she's trying to defend her life, and put on a strong, "I'm cool" front. Have you ever been talking to someone who intimidates you and you start making crap up? Like your boss, and he's telling you some story about his time in Napa Valley and for some reason you blurt out that your father owns a vineyard in France? He really doesn't, in fact, he's an alcoholic who's never been out of the country, but for some reason it sounds right to say. I think that's what happened with Britney. When she and Matt were strolling in her backyard, she mentions that she likes to clean. When Matt follows that statement up, wanting to hear about it, she's flustered, doesn't know what to say. She thought he'd just take her word on it and leave it at that. So then she realizes that people could find out if she has a maid and catch her in this horrible lie, so she admits that she does have a maid, but the bitch slacks a bit on her job. Because really, if you were cleaning Britney Spears house, wouldn't you sweep a few cigarette butts under the carpet? And now the lie is firmly in place and you have to make up more lies, saying how you love cleaning and when Matt asks you what someone would find you doing if they just walked into the house, you have to say cleaning. See, it starts with a small lie, to make yourself fit in, but then it escalates to where you're laughing to yourself hoping Matt Lauer never pops in unexpectedly and sees you're not exactly cleaning.
Matt then goes for it, and asks Brit about the possibility that Kevin may cheat on her, and leave her pregnant ass. He also asks her how she could go with him when he had a pregnant girlfriend. Come to find out, Britney's dumb. I mean we knew that, but people, she's really dumb. She tells us that she didn't know he had a pregnant girlfriend until they were together for a few months. Girl, WE knew he had a pregnant girlfriend, how come you didn't? And then she married the guy!
Really, how can you not feel just a little sorry for her?
Finally, Matt asked her what her life would be like if the pappies didn't follow her around. This is when my heart went out to the girl. She started crying, saying all she wants is her privacy. And look, I gotta back the sista up. She doesn't mind them taking pictures of her, even following her around a bit. The girl just doesn't like being chased around by these a**holes who are knocking on her car windows and hoping she does something dumb. I'm not saying she didn't ask for a little of this, but come on, she's just a white trash girl with a white trash husband trying to live her life. I say leave Britney alone.
