Do you remember Austin Power's Fembots?I understand different being beautiful, but truthfully, sometimes different is just ugly. Especially if you have an attitude problem, like Jade. The one thing this egotist doesn't need is a show telling her how pretty she is. Luckily, on the last panel, Nigel brought her big ass head out of the clouds and told her she was arrogant. Once back in the house after judging, she's hurt and annoyed that Nigel would think she's arrogant. I mean really, it's not arrogant to think everyone around you is jealous and stares at you when you walk by them in the street because you're so amazingly beautiful. Gina, and most of the girls I suspect, think it was great Jade got a bit of her own medicine. Furonda correctly points out that Jade's the type of person who finds someone weaker than herself (Gina) and kicks them while they're down to make herself feel better.
What's sad is he looks better than most of the girls
The next day the girls finally get their makeover. Kari, will get big, blonde Brigitte Bardot locks, even though they should have done something to straighten that out, like a flat iron or something. She's like the shaggy dog. Leslie will get thicker, longer hair. Sara will get a platinum blonde faux-hawk thing that actually looks really good. She's not happy with it though. Danielle will have a long, wavy weave, which again, doesn't realy look that different. Brooke will get a Gisele Bundchen do, because now she has her own hair cut I guess. Joannie will go icy blonde, whatever the hell that means. Nnenna will get all her hair buzzed off since she doesn't have much hair to begin with and she really worked that bald cap from last week's episode. Furonda will get a long, straight weave parted down the middle which makes her look a lot less like my Uncle Tyrone, finally. Wendy's hair will be lightened. Gina will get some angular layers which do nothing for her and look exactly like her hair was before, just washed and blown dry. Mollie Sue will get the Mia Farrow cut Tyra wanted Cassandra to get last time and she punked out. Jade's hair they cut short and dye it blonde. Does nothing to makes her more attractive or not a bitch.
With each style Jay gives it a name, like, "urban sexy chic". I have no idea what they all mean, but Jay tells the girls that the next day they'll be putting together outfits that best describe their new look. They'll be treated to a real life fashion show.
"Blah blah blah. Blah blah blah, I'm a dirty whore"
Of course once the makeovers are over they head back to the house Jade starts going off. She obviously gets on everyone's nerve, including mine, and if I ever see her in the street I'm gonna slap her across her high cheekbones. She's complaining that all high fashion models have long hair and why didn't they give her long hair. The girls all just want to shut her up, and I'm hoping one of them does. Jade's jealous of Furonda's new weave and disgusted that she keeps touching it and looking at herself with it. Shut up bitch, you know you'd be doing the same damn thing. Once at the house though things get bizarre. Furonda prints out a list of "rules" and hands them out to all of the ladies.
1. I will treat you in a way identical to, or worse than, the way you treat me.
2. I am the best person to discuss me with.
3. If you need anything other than emergency items, please do not ask me.
4. Stay out of my personal business unless I invite you in.
Wow, maybe I misjudged Furonda, maybe she's ugly and a bitch. The girls aren't too impressed and think she's acting like a Diva. The only way you can be a Diva is if you have stuff to back it up. In my opinion no one, and trust me, no one, in that house could ever be a Diva with the exception of Jay Manuel.
Damn that bitch is tall
At the fashion show the next day some fashion I wouldn't dress my worst enemy in walk down the runway and the girls pick out which outfits best describe their new looks. Jade's having a hard time because the hair's really thrown her off. Wendy of course is still distracted by her family in New Orleans. We do learn that she finally heard from them and they're alright. Luckily we're treated to some Cover Girl Queen Latifa face time. Naima from one of the past seaons is there with the girls and tells them the winner of this challenge will get a $5,000 shopping spree. Guess who wins? Yes, Nnenna. She looks beautiful and truly got what Jay was telling her about her "look". She chooses Gina and Jade to go with her on the spree and at first all of my confidence in Nnenna slips. That's until they interviewed her and she admitted that she only chose them because they weren't getting along and hoped this trip would help them become friends. Love her! Of course it didn't because Jade's a dumb bitch and Gina is completely clueless.
Nnenna is just STUNNING!
That night there's a little tension in the house. Poor Wendy's finally able to speak to her family and Jade decides to put on a hoodie and cause some trouble. Okay, hoodies only work for Jack Bauer, ho. She claims she hasn't been able to use the phone and wants Wendy off. Yeah, I mean come on, her parents are alive, why do they need to talk? All the girls think it's quite comical how ridiculous she's acting. She says she's not there to be friends, and that this isn't "American Next Top Best Friend". Although that would be a kick ass show. With dogs.
Who knew this plain Jane could be so HOT
The next challenge has to do with Ice, and since Jade's a frosty bitch I'm afraid she's going to do really well. They arrive at an ice company, I didn't know they had those, and are told they'll be posing in a little ice room with barely anything on. The torture of it all has me tuning in every week. Most of the girls have a hard time pulling this one off because they're sitting on blocks of ice in their underwear.
Ha-ha!
At the final evaluation we get to see the pictures and most of them aren't too great. Gina's doesn't look bad, for an ugly girl, and Furonda really stepped it up from last week when she was in the bottom two. Lastly is Jade, who starts to complain about the girls in the house. Nigel reminds her not to bring her baggage to judging. Then she starts complaining that the reason her picture didn't look good is because her eye make-up didn't look good. Yeah, if only it was the eye make-up, if only. Nigel tells her to shut her ugly pie hole and stop making excuses. When the judges talk privately about the girls, they point out Joannie's bad teeth and good Holy God. I didn't realize you could have such a messed up grill and still be a model. When the girls come back in we learn that Jade and Wendy are in the bottom too. They tell Wendy she doesn't take great picture and Jade that she's an annoying bitch. Since it's all about pictures Wendy gets kicked off. I'm not surprised but I wanted Jade to get her comeuppance.
